Who is Sonji?
It all started in June of 1981. Well my grandma had the name Sonji Simone sitting on a piece of paper somewhere for a few years prior. Long story.
Back to 1981, Duke University Hospital, Durham, NC. On the 18th day of June at 10:16am, there was a full moon and Sonji Simone Jones entered the world.
I was created from love. My parents were unwed, but later got married when I was 3 or 4. It is one of my 1st memories. I remember sitting on the table at the courthouse, feeling so much excitement, happiness, and love watching my parents kiss. Retrospectively, I knew that kiss meant forever.
Sadly, forever never happened.
My parents went through difficult times.
Pause: I am writing about ME, so I am omitting a lot, ok? Ok.
My parents separated and my mother and I went to go live with my grandma.
Life was good.
Then, it wasn’t.
January 6,1990, my world was rocked, turned upside down. I was permanently damaged. My mother unexpectedly passed away. One minute we were all playing board games, then, she took a nap and that was it. She was my comfort. I remember her smile (she gave it to my oldest son) and her quiet demeanor (she gave that to my youngest son). I hear that at 4’11” she was a force to be reckoned with, kinda like her 5’9” daughter, lol.
I did not attend her funeral.
To this day, I am grateful to my family for not making me go.
I moved to Norcross, Ga with my aunt, and experienced an immediate culture shock. It was 1990 and I was the ONLY black child in my class. The second half of my 3rd grade year was a whole struggle. I was behind academically but my aunt helped me hustle and get on track. From then on, I was determined to excel.
By high school, I was no longer the smartest, however I was among them. I had another culture shock in 10th grade when we moved to Stone Mountain, GA. I was back with people that looked like me, but I honestly, didn’t really feel like I fit in. It was then, my love for music grew (I had started playing the flute in 6th grade, but it got REAL in high school). Music is a universal language, so this is when I began making some lifelong bonds. Without band, without someone outside of my family pushing me, I never would have attended college. I was becoming defeated internally. I wasn’t the best at anything. I didn’t fit in. Without my flute and a book, who was I?
Well, I love helping people. I admired so many of my teachers so why not fulfill this dream and become a Social Studies teacher? I entered Bethune Cookman College (B-CU now) as a Social Science Education Major in the Fall of 1999 on fine arts and merit scholarships. The first semester was interesting. Fun? Yes, but it was beyond that. This is the time when I began to explore life. This is when I began releasing my “power”. So, I shook myself together, and when I was offered my scholarship for the next school year, I declined it and went home to GA.
I moved home with my aunt, but things were different. I was grown, so I thought. I was deceitful, disrespectful, and full of resentment. I enrolled in community college, worked on campus at a bookstore then a child development center (and UPS, too). I was still determined to become a teacher though.
Then, in my toxicity, I left home.
I did this twice to live with 2 different boyfriends. One loved me. One didn’t. The one that didn’t cause me to hit the reset button and move home to Durham, NC. I made it here with $20 that I borrowed from my grandma.
I moved back to NC in May of 2002 I was pregnant by October of the same year. The universe sent my first son to guide me, my Jacob.
I repeated a cycle of single parenthood. Until I let my insecurities lead me to get married. There are no mistakes in life. That marriage was sent to teach me how to love the man I’m with now. It taught me to NEVER allow anyone to let me lose sight of myself.
My grandmother passed away while I was married. She knew I was unhappy. She also knew I wouldn’t leave him. So, the universe sent me another guide a year and a few months later, my Julian.
Julian was born on Juneteenth in 2009 by Thanksgiving that year, I was strong enough to walk away from that marriage. My aunt worked some magic and boom life was good.
Then a year later, I met Tim online and that’s a whole new story about me that we ain’t finna get into yet.
Initially, however, I was using beading as a personal tool for healing when the pandemic began.
Prior to the pandemic my health had a horrible turn. I ended up having a hysterectomy in January of 2020. Shortly after returning to the classroom, the pandemic became real.
When given the choice that many educators faced in 2020, I was fearful but confident and chose to give my family my all.
So leaving education after 20 years was rough. The depression was real. But I wasn't doing all that beading for nothing. There was purpose, I needed me. I needed to trust in myself.
And in my well researched opinion, all beads matter and they’re all beautiful.
One day my cousin helped me with an acronym, and it just makes sense.
Divine Ornaments Providing Energy